I’ve Never Been To Me post #9

Have you heard the song “I’ve never been to me” by Charlene?

I really relate to much of it. I did not have all the good times and exciting adventures but I’ve never been to me. Below are some of the lyrics that stand out to me:

“I’ve Never Been To Me”

Hey lady, you lady
Cursing at your life
You’re a discontented mother
And a regimented wife
I’ve no doubt you dream about
The things you’ll never do
But, I wish someone had talked to me
Like I wanna talk to you

Whoooa, I’ve been to Georgia
And California and anywhere I could run…
But I ran out of places
And friendly faces
Because I had to be free

Hey, you know what paradise is
It’s a lie
A fantasy we create about people
And places as we’d like them to be
But you know what truth is
It’s that little baby you’re holding
And it’s that man you fought with this morning
The same one you’re going to make love with tonight
That’s truth, that’s love

Sometimes I’ve been to crying
For unborn children
That might have made me complete
But I, I took the sweet life
I never knew
I’d be bitter from the sweet

See, I have spent a lot of time searching for things, for happiness and I have not found it. I get that from my pop. He was the same. He had so much, but searched for something. He never found it. I have always had that desire to be free. I still do. This makes me think of another expression: Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose. I feel that is where I am headed. To a life with nothing left to lose.

Paradise just may be something we create in our head. A fantasy we create about people And places as we’d like them to be.

I do cry not only for the children I did not have (even though I never actually wanted to be pregnant) but also for the man I never had. The one to help me to get through this life. My life does not seem complete as it is. What makes it complete? The imaginary people. The imaginary spouse. The imaginary family and friends. That is how I make it complete.

I never had the sweet. I have only know the bitter.