I don’t know how many times I say “I hate…”. I sort of do and I sort of don’t. In the moment, I am filled with hate. But then I take a breath and I think to myself “I don’t hate ____, but I hate something. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
For example, I may say “I hate people”, but I take a breath and think “I hate when people do ____”. It is still hate. The focus has changed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yet, I still say “I hate” numerous times a day. I do it when I am overly frustrated. I may be tired. I may feel defeated. I may feel hopeless. I may want to surrender. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But at the same time I don’t give up. I keep on trying. I don’t even know why. For ten years, life has become progressively worse. I keep waiting for my life to hit rock bottom. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It is really stupid for people to say life will get better. Things will turn around. Bad times don’t last forever. Because there is nothing to prove that otherwise. How long does it take to turn around? I don’t just idly stand by waiting for change. I try to make things better. But everything I try fails. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I hate my life. Okay, so I don’t hate my life. I hate the struggle. I hate the going through this disaster all alone. I wish I had some joy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Life should be happy, healthy, joyful, loving and alive. I am mostly healthy. I am alive. I am loving, but no one is loving toward me. I just need to work on the happy, joyful parts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I don’t know how many times I say “I hate…”. I sort of do and I sort of don’t. In the moment, I am filled with hate. But then I take a breath and I think to myself “I don’t hate ____, but I hate something. For example, I may say “I hate people”, but … Continue reading Hate Everything post 20<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":655,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1452","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/655"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1452"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1453,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1452\/revisions\/1453"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1452"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1452"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ctacoaches.com\/lisay\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1452"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}